Just checking

Hey-is there anyone out there that is reading this? I never hear from anyone so I'm just wondering if keeping up on this blog is worthwhile.

We had another close brush with tornados this week. The tornado sirens went off for about an hour and a half. We were out watching the storm clouds. Several times they began swirling over our house and we started to take cover indoors, and then it broke up. Unfortunately, the Boy Scout camp about 40 miles away was not so lucky. They took a direct hit from the tornado and four scouts were killed. It has been a hard week hearing stories of what happened. Three of the boys were from the metro.

Yesterday I volunteered with TBH for the first time. It was really great. I was paired up with a young girl. Her dad had died. She made a comfort pillow out of her dad's favorite sweatshirt, a memory box with her dad's picture on top, a garden stone, a bracelet with her dad's name on it, a sock puppet, a father's day card, and she had her face painted. As we got to know each other, she talked with me about her dad, her feelings, and we even laughed as she shared some good memories of her dad. I think she had a good time and I hope it helped her too. I really look forward to volunteering again!

Today, I am upset. My boys are shutting us right out of their lives. They NEVER bring friends over. When I ask why-they say because there's nothing to do. I ask what they do at their friend's houses. Other than watch cable tv (which we don't have), they could do the same things here as they do there. Nate wouldn't even introduce us to his new girlfriend. I finally went up to her door and introduced myself when I picked Nate up! I ask if we embarrass them or our house embarrasses them. They say no. Noah has a friend from college staying with us for a few days. He was here for less than a half hour when they left to go to a friend's house to watch the game. They were watching the game on our tv before they left! It is father's day and both our boys took off! That is another sore spot. One son has no money, so I suggested two things he could do for his father that wouldn't cost him anything. He could clean his car out or he could pick cherries from our tree. He decided to do nothing-and then whine to his father that he doesn't have any money (same excuse I heard the past two mother's days)..... His brother hadn't said a thing other than groan about his awful sunburn. At three thirty, I called him at home and asked if he even knew what today was. He said he knew. At four he called me from the grocery store where he works and asked if his dad likes Merlot or Chardonnay. I said neither. He went on to say he was just going to get the fancy Merlot glasses because his friend's parents (where he is hanging out tonight) had them and they were classy. Now this rubbed me wrong for a couple of reasons. First of all, he ran to the store and just bought something to give to his father without much thought or reason. Second, he thinks so highly of his friend's parents and so little of us. We have red wine glasses. We don't need them-but because his friend's parents have them they are classy. We aren't classy enough I guess. If it were just this, I'd let it pass, but it is so obvious that he adores and prefers them. He wants to be a doctor like his friend's father, not so he can help people or go on missions trips (like his mother had taught him), but so he can have a sweet black Mercedes just like this doctor. He makes me feel so little because I can't compete with this family. I tell him to wear sunscreen and he rolls his eyes at me and tells me to stop mothering him. He gets a blistering sunburn and his other friend's father (also a doctor) talks with him about the increased chances of developing melanoma after getting a bad sunburn (something his mother has told him and tried to help him prevent) and he listens and respects what he has to say. I'm just really disappointed with our boys and they way they treat us. They have really rich friends and they like to pretend they are rich too and I guess when they look at their parents and their home, it is a reality check. So instead of accepting us and appreciating us for who we are and what we do have to offer-they run away and so they can keep pretending. It really hurts to be treated so poorly. I sure do miss my mom at times like these. You could bounce these kind of things off her and she would tell you if this is a normal stage and it will pass. She would remind me that I did these things too. Without her I feel so lost.

Belle had an accident this week. We'll have to keep an eye on her. If it keeps happening, I know it is time to put her down.

Well, I need to sign off and get to bed. One more week of work and then vacation!